How Much Time Should You to Give Guests to RSVP for Your Wedding?

Once you've mailed your wedding invitations, the waiting game begins: Engaged couples everywhere know what it's like to anxiously check the mailbox each day to see if any new wedding guest RSVPs have been delivered. While waiting for responses to arrive is something of a wedding-planning rite of passage, knowing that everyone goes through it doesn't make the process any easier. The one thing that will? Having a plan in place to get everyone to respond in a timely manner. That all starts with a clear RSVP deadline.

Here, we explain when your wedding guest RSVPs should be due, exactly how long to give potential attendees to get their responses in, and tips on how to get everyone to mail those cards back.

When Should Wedding RSVPs Be Due?

Ideally, the "RSVP by" date should fall three to four weeks before your wedding. Because your wedding invitations should be mailed six to eight weeks prior to the big day, guests should generally have a window of about one month to RSVP. "This way, it's close enough that your guests feel like they can't put it off, yet it's not so close that they've made other plans," explains Arizona-based wedding planner Chandra Keel, owner of Chandra Keel Events.

There's a good reason behind this timing: You and your partner need to know who is coming to the wedding before you can make your seating chart. A number of vendors—like your wedding planner, caterer, and transportation company—will require a final guest count to be in ahead of the big day; this helps them plan for meals, order the correct number of tables and chairs, and ensure there are enough shuttles for everyone. A late RSVP can put everyone behind.

6 Ways to Ensure Everyone RSVPs on Time

No one wants to spend the last few weeks before their wedding tracking down RSVPs. While it's very likely that you'll have to follow up with at least one or two delinquent guests no matter what you do, there are steps you can take to ensure most everyone RSVPs on time.

Include a Pre-Addressed, Pre-Stamped Return Envelope

The easiest way to ensure RSVPs arrive on time? Make it easy for your guests. Be sure to include a pre-addressed, pre-stamped return envelope within your invitation suite so that they have no reason not to pop that card in the mailbox.

Give Guests Options for RSVPing

Everyone likes options, and realistically, the more ways your guests can say "yes" or "no" to the wedding, the better for you, right? While mail-in cards are still the traditional choice, not everyone uses the mail as they once did. If possible, include an option for guests to digitally submit their RSVP via your wedding website.

Choose the Right Wording

According to Keel, oftentimes guests don't really know what RSVP means, nor do they understand that a response is needed, even if they are declining the invitation. "Using wording such as, 'The favor of your reply is requested by [insert date]' in place of 'RSVP' makes it crystal clear," she says.

Ask for Song Requests

Erica Taylor, co-founder of Tinsel & Twine, says her clients have had great success when there's an engaging call to action or participation factor included on the response card. "For example, 'RSVP with a song that will keep you on the dance floor,' or 'RSVP with your favorite memory of the bride and groom.'"

Add Extra Time for Destination Weddings

Because destination weddings require arranging flights and accommodations, there's a different RSVP timeline. RSVPs should be due two months before the wedding, and the wedding invitations should be sent out approximately four months before the wedding. This will give guests ample time to make travel plans if they didn't when they first received your save-the-date.

With a destination wedding, you'll be glad you have an early RSVP deadline because then you'll have plenty of buffer time to make sure every guest is accounted for, as well as get a sense of when people will be arriving and departing so you can plan pre- and post-wedding events accordingly.

Make the RSVP Date Clear

It might seem obvious, but make sure the RSVP date is in an extremely legible font on the card itself. If you're including an option to RSVP on your wedding website, a countdown ticker is a good option.